A pretty peaceful night for the most. What I thought was going to be a good night instead am left with a headache wishing it wasnt cold so I could make my way outside for a bit. I guess I can lay low for few and turn up the babble...
I dont know about anyone else but I sure do love the direction I am in. It can be a joy to have a grasp on the ideal thought of life for peace of mind. I am sure life is much more sweeter to hold in my hand the knowledge I am grounded and ready for anything headed for me.
I never was fearful growing up but I honestly say there have been times where I couldnt see to far away. Even that at its worst in my case, it was just over some years I found myself understanding everything that put me in a not knowing place. I will say with pride I walked all that way by myself in my head, with this I end up slapping myself in the face as I saw I was dead wrong all those times I spoke them words. I may not have had anyone to turn to in those dreadful days I thought I was alone, but I came to realize I knew all along exactly what I was going through. The hardships I faced were only hardships because I didnt understand like I always thought I did.
In my very moment I accepted the fact that I had been living the complete opposite of what I made out I was able to see all I had dreamt of, and the pieces just started pulling together. As time went on I saw life in a whole new light I chose to open up to. A decision I am glad I never regreted throughout any of my so called hardships was that I was patient enough to not nut up on anyone.
All those years I pouted and threw fits turned out that I never needed to worry about anything because my answers were already in me. I just had to stop and pay attention to what was in my heart and leave my mind be. I think Ive gotten this far on my own, and I love to endulge in this... but my dreams tell me otherwise. The shit I had to go through to learn there is nothing that can show me otherwise. Nevertheless the only thing that changed during all that was my driving!
One thing I know about who I use to be is she was one wandering aimlessly in an illusion that is gone forever. My way began then, and so now after all these years I feel it can only get better as I move on.
My past has been a rough road, but it wouldnt have been a hardship if it wasnt in my head. I guess it was the image they were looking for, and image is what they got. As for me, I really would like to see what they are going to do with my image and then it is there I will know who I am.
I hope everyone has beautiful dreams while in rest to keep you warm as I do ~ except you you and you... Nah Im joking! NOT:) ~ you know who you are ~
♥ Sweetdreams ♥
No comments:
Post a Comment